Hephzibah House Journal

Hephzibah House Journal
Susan Grotte's journal from her experience as a student at Hephzibah House, told in short-story form.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Suzanne Risner: Survivor!



I stayed at HH for my entire 15 months. I was miserable.

My impression of HH before I arrived was that girls whom were very rebellious, partied, drank, did drugs, and had sex were sent there. I did none of those things. My other 2 sisters were sent before me and they wish not speak of their ordeal.

Upon arriving you showered and immediately put on one of their uniforms. You were escorted downstairs and joined the rest of the girls, while staff went through your clothes and then you put them away. I hated marking the BM chart, and I always marked that I went because I didn't want to see what happened if you didn’t.

The pad basket was an embarrassment for me because I was such an heavy flow and always needed to change 6 x a day. I was told I was being wasteful. Excuse me! How would they feel walking around with a drenched pad on.

I was, after a few weeks, able to clean Kagins house, work outside, and clean the school building. I always looked forward to working with Aaron. He treated us like human beings. I remember when the rule came down we couldn't talk to any of the men at HH. I just thought it was ridiculous. I am sorry Aaron passed away. I am going to miss him.

One night after we went to bed, I was called upstairs. Basically Wenda chewed me out while Donald sat and looked stupid. I was "rebuked" for my desire to join the military. After a 30 minute "talk" I was spanked for my rebellion. Then Wenda was made because I didn't cry, and she thought that she should spank me again.

I also remember cleaning the "big bath" and Sharon came in and started talking to me, and while she was talking she was checking. I knew I didn't ask her to check it. So when supper arrived I was told I wasn't eating because I had failed my chores. I questioned her on it. Well, I had to drink my supper, and later I was spanked for arguing and lying.

I am now a mom of 6 kids, and I would never send my girls there.